When you quack like a duck all you get is quack quack and quack and quacking never gets any respect.
Last week we had a quacking meeting , where all the quackers were there and then an interesting thing happened. We are all like sitting in a meeting and the head quacker says , hey you , Doug and chuck leave the room, so we left while the thirty or so quackers kept on quacking.
Not only that we were asked to come back at 3 pm and wait outside like a bunch of peons. Note all of us were at senior level but the reason we got kicked out was because the quackers wanted to discuss development plans and since we did not have enough people working for us our opinions were not worth it , so we left. Outside we thought how disrespectful and then it got me thinking , why do we allow ourselves to be disrespected
For example in august I had bought my son a computer. So the computer had problems and I asked him to return it for the full refund. As luck would have it , there was a postal strike in Canada and I asked him to go to Detroit to mail the computer, you think my son did not, sheer disrespect, he had a camping trip to go and he decided that his camping trip was worth more than a 1000 dollars and to cut the long story short I had to drive down to Canada to pick up the computer and take it to Detroit and mail it , a trip that cost me a lot of money and 13 hours of drive time which for him would have taken less than 30 minutes but that is disrespect. It was not something that was a misunderstanding, it was a choice he made and there is no apologizing on his part that is going to make up for the disrespect he showed. He knows what he did was wrong and though for him he did write an apology letter I also know what respect he holds for our relationship
So why do we allow ourselves to be disrespected. Doing the right thing does not mean that you disrespect someone or have them lose respect for you. “Losing respect for someone is not reversible; when its lost its lost, it’s gone. It’s not a misunderstanding, it’s a choice, a person’s decision to do something disrespecting towards themselves so it’s not like conflict between parties where apologizing or forgiving someone or vice versa, where strong character and respect is shown between two parties for whatever reason, where both parties gain and move forward together or move on separately but with respect and still somewhat caring feelings about each other. When respect is lost because of weak character resulting in disrespectful displays and selfish showings only one party gains and that’s the party that shows they don’t care what anyone thinks except for themselves so in turn they got everything that they set out for and in return also get what they show, no care, no respect by showing….no care, no respect”
I have often said that “Don’t accept less than what it is that you know that you want. Don’t allow someone to be a jerk. Don’t allow someone to disrespect you. listen to the bigger voice in your head telling you that you deserve the best, whatever that is whatever that is you decide you like for yourself. It may differ from what I like or what is ideal for me. But the bottom line is to never accept less than what you know you deserve.”
If one wants to be respected then one has to show that they have respect for themselves and their respect for themselves is always true blue and can’t be swayed, always maintained. It takes constant maintaining to earn and keep one’s respect and a simple moment to lose that respect and once gone is how people will always be remembered no matter what phony smiles phony people around them show them. People think different and certainly talk different behind a disrespected person’s back. Their smiles and words towards them are cheerful but phony, but their ears and disrespected thoughts towards them are true and their true feelings about them are always shared with others.
No one can take away our self respect unless we allow them to. In our lives we have to teach people how to treat us and treating us with RESPECT SHOULD BE NUMBER ONE unless we don’t have respect for ourselves by allowing ourselves to be walked over or spoken to disrespectfully, then it doesn’t matter and then we deserve what we get…NO RESPECT
In our life people will make you mad , disrespect you and treat you bad but if you start hating then the only thing in your heart will be hate. Let God take care of the things others do and you worry only about the joy of your life. I often tell people that however badly I am treated I meet the same people with a smile and I never try to relive the past for what is the point of that .
If You ignore disrespect you are surely showing a sign that you are a willing party to the disrespect, Getting back to the quackers, all three of us went and told our bosses how disrespected we felt in being kicked out in front of 30 people.
It is not about pride or being stubborn , You simply cannot allow people to disrespect you or treat you badly. Show people how you expect to be treated and if they walk away then they walk away
More times or so women get disrespected in a relationship. A friend of mine dated a guy for almost 10 years, she did everything for him, drove him to work , managed his finances and all he could tell her , hmmm I do not want to marry you and so on and on it went. For her being married meant a lot, you know the ceremony , cake and all that but more important it is the legal part, when you are married you get tax breaks , you are eligible for pension, health benefits of the dead spouse , if the spouse is in a hospital you get the first news , a companion will never be able to do that , that is why I want to get married and not live with someone , lot more benefits being married. But then I always go towards the legality . Getting back to my friend Joe was always first and she was last. He had her whole heart when she had half of his and when it all fell apart , he took her heart with him . I remember the day she broke it off with him finally. There were tears and tears and she kicked him to the curb. I told Darlene do not hold on to man who does not care about losing you. If he is dumb enough to walk away , then be smart enough to let him go Easy to say so hard to do.
Do not lose yourself in an attempt to hold on to someone who does not care about losing you. There are thing that we do not want to happen but have to accept things, things we do not want to know but have to learn and people we cannot live without but have to let go.
I tell my friends as they break up and are happy again that if you have never felt your heart being ripped apart, the agony of waiting for someone, the joy of being with the person you love then check your pulse for you may be dead., so what would I rather have, I rather have a million heartbreaks than never knowing love, never telling someone I love you and never living life
So doing the right thing does not mean disrespecting others, for example the quackers could have easily told us separately that they did not want us to attend the meeting rather than embarrass us in front of 30 people, my son could have easily go to Detroit to return the computer but doing the right thing does not mean that you embarrass or hurt the ones who care or work for you. In times like I always say , people who disrespect you , they also disrespect others for disrespect is not a random act , it is a learned act over the years and fine tuned like a harp and aged like wine.,
So in the end do not quack like a duck, soar like an eagle to up and beyond with respect