I want to know when did most women in technical professions give up dresses and just start wearing pants I know very few women engineers because there are very few and almost all of them wear pants, when this pant revolution take place. I know that the last time I wore a dress to work was in 1999 and after that I just gravitated to wearing pants, nature of my job, getting in and out of cars, working with parts, just easier to wear pants, I went so far ahead that I stopped buying dresses, well to wear dresses you wear heels and after I managed to break both my feet sequentially I just started wearing sneakers and so went away dresses. I asked all my friends, no we do not own dresses, are you kidding
So the question is why, is it because a suit shows toughness but what is toughness. For a woman in engineering the odds are good but the goods are odd. So for a woman who is a position of power why do we define our professionalism by wearing pants, I see women doctors and all the ones I have seen wear pants. By the way there are not that many. I am a woman engineer and here is the funny part. My son has a mother who is an engineer and yet we are so conditioned to believe the men in everything I can say for myself that years ago I went to get my car oil changed. I asked to talk to the mechanic as I am a micro manager (well you have to be if you are by yourself) and when the mechanic came out it was a women and shameful it is to me that I actually wanted to talk to the male. I said hey wow there, why is a woman mechanic not as capable as man. Consciously or sub consciously I have very rarely had a woman doctor. I tend to go to male doctors but that is possibly based on me being a chatty Kathy all the time and I only like talkative people. My son at age 4 declared to me that women cannot be engineers, I am like Buddy who is paying for this mansion and he is like you and I am like what do I do and he says engineer and I said is mummy not an engineer and he is like well you are not an engineer you are MUMMY. So for the little guy I will be MUMMY or mama or whatever he wants or now just MOM.
I see that at all the time. In a room all look to the women to do the work but the decision is always directed to the man. I remember when I was a fresh engineer off school one of the senior female engineers told me that watch in a meeting men will always look to the female to take notes or make coffee and I was watchful that when I was asked I always redirected the question to the men in the room so slowly in every company men have learnt that I am not the designated coffee maker. I guess that is why I started to wear pants to fit in the men world. When you have short hair and wear pants I project an image that hey I am not a female but a male Maybe that is why you do not see many women in technical professions wear makeup, hey whatever gets us to look tough and you have to be tough to sit in a room of at least 5 6 feet men who are all busy knocking your project and deliverables off and you have to defend your project. At times you say , hey this is not personal but business but then I am still a girl that I do often go to the ladies room and cry , makes me feel better. So I may wear pants but I still cry like a girl at times. No wonder how I dress up like a man you still have female hormones and I am proud of that.
It just struck me recently that I do not have a dress so I said I am going to get one. I guess I became manlier for living in a non relationship world I never saw the need. I would get dresses for dates but lately since I am not dating anyone due to lack of good quality men I have gone back to the pant lady.
We tell girls be doctors, be engineers but we forgot to tell them about sexism and the glass ceiling. That is you will see most women as electrical engineers or industrial engineers as less interaction with gorillas at work. Very few women are mechanical like me. It is hard at first but you learn not to volunteer to make coffee or take notes. I just side swipe it with hey let us just record this conference. Believe it still happens today to me but I handle it like an expert.
Devdas tells me that I could not adjust with an Indian man so stop looking for one. I was just having fun talking to men who think that I will now marry them in less than a month, give up my job and hand over my property and assets , kick my son out of my house and hand over my pay cheque , not going to happen ever again. I did that once when I first came to Canada. My ex husband would not even give me 5 cents as per him, why do you need money I pay all the bills. I remember my neighbor took me out for lunch where she assumed that I would pay my own lunch and I did not have the money. Or the fact that he would mark the Pepsi bottles so that he could monitor how much I drank when he was not home and then people in my family question why I left him or when he kicked me and my son out in winter we never went back. The reason is that I intimidate Indian men save one but since he is not available there is no point of discussing him. I pull an awesome pay cheque and run my own affairs so I live like a transient that is by choice because I am a dope but more on that later. I thank God for giving me the strength for handling every job loss with finesse and grace. I am Grace under pressure
Here is sexism from women, someone told me some time ago that I only get jobs because I am a woman or maybe I am willing to move and do anything I am like sure let us forgot my intelligence so how can women advance when our kind knocks us off. No wonder we wear pants
Or the best one is when I am told you are too emotional , sure I am emotional why not ,what is wrong with that , it is in my genetic makeup to be emotional at least I have an ego that writes cheques I can cash.
I know when I went to get a mortgage the bank manager who was a woman told me that I needed to get a co signer and I am like why, she said well….I said listen my class fellow who makes less than me did not need one so why did I , then we were back to me being single , the reason why I know the legality of every situation is because I am often discriminated against, let us start form the top , woman, single , single parent , engineer , non Caucasian and let us add to Canadian People ask me why I did engineering , nothing glamorous , I wanted to marry an engineer when I was in grade school and then it did not happen I looked at my options while on welfare and working at Tim Horton, I used to see all the cool engineers come with their cool leather jackets and study so I said why not , I did not do engineering to save the world or make a better place I did it so I could give my little T Rex a better home and buy a car ( which incidentally I never did get) I did get the leather jacket and alas it does not fit me , too chunky for that now Still in my closet.
What makes me come alive is not engineering but law for the world does need a person who has come alive. I spent way too many years criticizing myself for years, and it hasn’t worked. Last year I decided to try approving myself thanks to HYM and it has worked miracles.
I removed the Please Like me post its stickers on my foreword and moved them to the mirror and that is the key to my happiness.
I am not waiting for a Prince Charming to come rescue me, I need Prince Charming to talk to me and spend time with me intellectually as well as emotionally. I am not waiting for a doctor or a lawyer or engineer for I have my own status. Some women think that marrying a man who is a professional will make your life better but only if you are not progressing yourself. But if I could find Prince Charming that would be awesome but if not then life is good now. I am very young and like I said earlier I rather be alone writing my blogs than be with a ding bat who does not respect me
Once you know what love is at least I am not a person who settles for less. I am going to start buying dresses for why not ……