My son knew at age 8 what it took me many years to realize that being upfront does not pay. I am not saying one should be dishonest but providing details only leads you to trouble, see various case studies
Answer the question, not give details. For example if someone asks you did you go there just say yes or no do not run into stories of what happened there etc
At work try to look very busy and very important. time and time again on being laid off one thing is always consistent person like me who constantly put in more hours without getting paid, takes on extra assignments that no one wants always loses the job. Took me many years to realize that it was not me when my son told me who told you that by working hard you get ahead and promoted., it is not how hard you work but how you play the game, I have given myself promotions in money and positions just by saying this is what I want and take it or leave it
This section does not apply to arranged marriages and only to my ex fiancée number one in lousiana________________________________________________________________________
Relationship wise men do not want a woman who is nice, they say they do and yet most of the nice ones are single, if a guy is too nice women will say oh shucks he is a pushover and move on because nice men are not attractive, the greater the jerk the more women he will get as women even me gravitate to bad boys the question is when you can have so much and yet go for so little.
I had a cheating ex fiancée ok so maybe I drove him crazy with being sick the latter part of the relationship , the Indian culture will say oh if he cared he would stayed with you well not really, sickness does put a strain on the relationship,
I remember his new wife calling me after four months , I said honey you can have him because he is boring , an idiot and I simply do not want him, that is my standard line if my fiancée wants to go and cheat she can have him , since Indians in my home town will use any excuse to put me down , said well you intimidated him with being an engineer, I said listen he was not a dummy himself, he was an educated professional and seriously I am a single women by herself with a child to raise , what I am supposed to do sit her waiting for dummy to come , I have to pay my bills buy my own house, if he is intimidated with me being an engineer well then he knew and loved me when I was not an engineer so being an engineer has nothing to do with it, he is a dope. Of course now he wants me as I am single and really do not give him much time of the day. He is in the middle of the divorce and now of course he will call me especially when I am going to go to Louisiana and not visit him
Dating Caucasian men is not a big deal. I tried with Indian men and at every step I was told drop the kid , well I am not going to do that , a lot of Indian women have done that but not me., I simply cannot lose the kid like I said even after 25 years when I have my own assets some Indian men will still ask me to lose the kid, by the way the kid is 21 now , why cannot our culture accept a woman with kids , I would say the same for Indian women., some Indian men who are divorced tell me that they have a hard time talking to some Indian women because the women ask them to make a choice, I am like do not go out with dummies, wait I am insulting dummies by saying that.
Marriage should be of minds not banking balances. For example I am an engineer; I am not going out with someone who is less qualified than me. I wonder how people feel after being married for 20 years or so, do they still have the spark I do not know, the ones I know are pretty miserable or have no comment
They live their hum drum lives and go on down the road in a little boat of reality that they are paddling with the oars of children.oh well
Things I find strange is how can you not want to have your husband/wife look nice. Some of the husbands/wives I see leave the house looking like a ratty doll my dog brought in if I had a dog. I guess when you have married for a long time one thinks why look nice, WRONG you need to look nice for yourself and not for anyone else. One excuse someone gave me was if they look nice other women or men might find their mates attractive, no if you keep your husband /wife looking ugly you deserve them as no one else wants them How do you like them apples. No one wants you or your wife
Fiancée 2 was a very good looking man and all my friends used to say .are you not lucky that you are with him, I always asked him do you not think he is lucky to be with me, just a matter of perspective , for example in my husband search I am talking to a few men who are doctors, people always say are you not lucky that doctors are interested in you I am like no because they should feel lucky they are talking to me , Money does not buy you happiness or talk to you in times of trouble so I rather be with someone who I love than be with a profession